THE GREAT GADFLY:

His Brains Oozed Nice...



...like a melted malted.

I have a fever today, damn it. Of course I do. I'm going on a weekend pleasure trip tomorrow. Why shouldn't I get a damn flu-cold before I go on a freakin' weekend pleasure trip?! It only makes sense. After all, I CAN'T HAVE ANYTHING NICE, EVER. Even NATURE conspires against me at the very HINT of me POSSIBLY encountering JOY. GAH!!!!

WHY CAN'T I HAVE A LITTLE FUN WITHOUT PROBLEMS OCCURRING? WHY?!?!

A man deserves a little pleasure in his life. It's not right that I should be sick. My pleasure, it will not be denied. I will experience pleasure this weekend even if it means I am being pleasured from an iron lung.

Actually, that sounds kind of hot.

Part of me thinks I should start strategizing ways to leave work early today so I can go home, load up on the Nyquil, and be right as rain in the morning for my big trip; a larger part of me, however, has lapsed into that feverishly dadaist place where the bright fluourescent lights and funny funny co-workers are bringing my swollen brain lots of entertainment, and the simple act of walking on office carpet brings me wild sensation. Oooh. Who needs LSD when you can get the flu for free? That rhymed.

I like how some of my office supplies are smooth, and some of them have a bumpy texture. Yet they are all black and non-reflective. I like textures.

Slow, Slow
The way to go
Didn't you know?
We all go slow!
Hey, mister zippyman, what's the rush?
Yer gonna turn them feet into yuckypoo mush
Slow yer ass on down and stroll with me
Let's talk about pies and take it E-Z
Slow, slow
Doe-dee-doe-doe.

That was my slow people poem. As you can see, it is in the shape of an owl. I can see it, anyway...

My co-workers are having a reality TV discussion forum right now. If you'll pardon me, I need to fire up the ol' dissociative defense mechanisms now....


2003-10-14 - Last Haiku
2003-10-09 - Don't Cry Out Loud
2003-10-09 - Sit Down, You're Making Me Nervous
2003-10-08 - I'm Sure Miss Thing, I'm Sure
2003-10-07 - Carbonated Water, Caramel Color, Aspartame

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