THE GREAT GADFLY:

Sickie Is A Saddie



About four hours into my first day back at work after my festive birthday weekend out east, I became very sick. I'm sicker still today. I think perhaps I may stay home sick tomorrow. I wish I knew of a way to forecast this to my supervisor - "it's a safe bet I won't be coming in tomorrow, because being here today is no easy task" - but I always feel like if I'm sick, work wants to hear about as sudden drama delivered over voice mail rather than something you're trying to forecast. I don't know. I don't know what I'm saying today. I'm feverish, and I can't make out what people say to me when they speak. I ordered a sandwich for lunch today, and I'm sure I looked at the guy at the counter as if he had chair legs sprouting from his mouth. Woe.

There's nothing to do this week. Everyone who gives orders is out on vacation this week. Everyone else is either laying low or else is in some kind of frenzied busybody-on-speed regimen. Were I too busy to remember I'm sick, that would be good. I'd like that. Give me a deadline, an administrative emergency, something. My inbox reads "ennui". Oh, no. No no no.

I'm not registering my surroundings today. Everything is hyper-immediate. I have no consciousness of the fact that it's 95 degrees outside. I have no consciousness of the little ironies that creep through the office today. Everything has the surreal urgency of when one is shaken out of a sound sleep and must scramble to become oriented with waking reality. Only, I've been up since 7 a.m. and I'm still scrambling. Brain fever - gotta love it.

I think my resident online hecklers may actually be my downstairs neighbors Zod & Ursa, infiltrating Gadflyland incognito. If this is the case and they're reading this today, do you guys have any good cold medication? Like, prescription stuff? Nyquil and Tylenol Cold Formula just ain't cutting it. If you have anything good, just leave it outside my door. Thanks. And don't spike it with your Kryptonian urine - I'm sick and not in the mood, so don't be assholes.

Bottom line is this: All I can offer you people today is more wigs.

See?


2003-10-14 - Last Haiku
2003-10-09 - Don't Cry Out Loud
2003-10-09 - Sit Down, You're Making Me Nervous
2003-10-08 - I'm Sure Miss Thing, I'm Sure
2003-10-07 - Carbonated Water, Caramel Color, Aspartame

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